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Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin]

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G-Unit
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PostSubject: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Fri 25 Mar 2011, 10:24 pm


Haretsu Raizou

THE INFO.

Name: Haretsu Raizou
Nickname: Rai
Age: 12
Gender: Male
Appearance:
5 foot 1 inches tall, small build. He weighs about 120 pounds and has red hair and green eyes (not normal for his clan). He has a scar on his left cheek from a fall when he was nine. His face is very smooth, and some would say it was "girlish". He is a pretty boy. He has very kind eyes, that light up when he is happy or excited. He wears a black fishnet T shirt , black pants and shinobi sandals. He tends to wear clothes that are a little tight so he can show off his body. Over his shirt he will usually wear a black jacket with multiple pockets in it for his ninja tools. On the inner most pocket of his jacket is some ninja wire. His forhead protector his located around his neck. He isnt very muscular but he is well toned. He has an earing on his left ear in the shape of a key, the earring being a present from his sister. He has mouths on the palms of his hands, for his clan jutsu. He also wears pouches on his left and right hip filled with special clay that he uses for jutsu. Raizou wears a pouch on each of his lower thighs that have kunai in them. His Sword is located on his hip, like a samurai would wear it. The sheath is black, and his sword has the inscription "Death is just another part of life" across the blade.

Personality:
Very cheerful and kind hearted. He is very passionate about art, thinking about it constantly. Would help an old lady cross the street or help with groceries, he often thinks of others before himself. But on the battle field he is cruel and relentless almost going into a haze of madness. He loves to make friends and have fun. Raizou's feelings can get hurt quite easily though and he fears rejection. Oddly enough Raizou is a very determined person, setting his goals really high. When he gets knocked down he gets back up and tries again. For Raizou the phrase "I cant" doesnt exist he will try again, even if it kills him. Raizou dislikes people who show off. He is also very modest. He doesnt really accept compliments, if he recieves one he will deny it instantly and start to blush. Raizou likes to flirt with girls but is too afraid to tell a girl that he likes her. When embaressed by others Raizou will act out in some way to try and divert their attention from him. He is very protective of the people that he loves, if one of then gets hurt he will stop at nothing to make that person pay. He views the world as a canvas to shape and paint as he sees fit, knowing that everything that he and his fellow shinobi do affect the overall painting. There is also a constant sense of uncertainty with Raizou because he just wants to make his family proud of him. He struggles to live in the shadow of his older sister, who is a prodigy.


Clan: Haretsu Clan
Nindō: Never stop fighting unless you or your opponent stops breathing or gives up.

THE NINJA.

Origin: Iwagakure, Iwagakure Hospital
Affiliation: Iwagakure
Rank: Genin
Specialties: Ninjutsu, Kenjutsu
Elemental Affinities: Doton ; Suiton
Combat Style: Raizou doesnt like to be up close and personal and use Taijutsu. Raizou is mainly a ranged fighter but if the fight comes to close combat he will use his sword.
Special Characteristics:

Spoiler:
 

THE BACKGROUND.

History:
Childhood Arc:
Raizou grew up like a normal kid in Iwagakure, mother and father both going on missions constantly, so his older sister was the one who took care of him most of the time. From a very young age Raizou looked up to his sister Yui, who cooked and cleaned and protected him. He went everywhere with her and became her shadow. They were the best of friends. Together forever.
Academy Arc:
Raizou and his older sister Yui both went to the academy, though she went a couple years before Raizou. Unlike his sister, Raizou wasnt very liked in the academy, he was bullied a lot too. But his sister would always come to his rescue and make everybody leave him alone. They would always eat their lunches that Yui had made under a large tree in the courtyard. He and his sister were very close, she would be able to know exactly what to do to cheer Raizou up if he was sad. She had even given him an earing for his birthday, he loved that earing so much. One day He and his sister were walking home from the academy the bullies encircled them both, being fed up with Raizou. They started teasing Raizou again, one of them even pushed him down. One of the decided to push his sister when she tried to make them stop. Something inside Raizou snapped and he started pummeling the kid who pushed his sister. The other kids ran home and told their parents. Raizou finally stopped when the other kids' parents pulled him off the kid. Raizou, having found some self confidance and bravery he started to exell in school. The bullies left him alone and wasnt so sad anymore.
Genin Arc: Raizou stood triumphantly on the stage with the rest of his class as he recieved his headband. He felt very excited and optomistic about becomming a genin. He looked out into the crowd of people who had gathered to watch the next generation of ninja be born. He saw his sister who looked up and smiled at him, the sun shining down on both of their headbands. He couldnt wait to go on missions and claim fame.


Roleplay Sample:
(from another site )

Raizou swallows hard, out of breath as he slides down the trunk of a giant tree trunk. The cool air assaulting his lungs, he closes his eyes and tries to catch his breath. CRASH A nearby tree explodes and Raizou springs to his feet and takes off further into the forrest. It was getting harder and harder to run, Raizou's legs burned so much and were so tired. Why did i choose this? Raizou asked himself as he panted and leaned on a nearby tree and tried to catch his breath. Raizou hits the tree he is leaning on in frustration and in that split second of unawareness, he feels the coldness of metal and smells the sweet smell of perfume. Raizou raises his hands and says "i guess you win again sis." They always played hide and go seek tag together, ever since they were little. His sister had always won and both of them being ninja now only made the game that much more fun. Except that Raizou was getting really tired of losing all the time.


THE ARSENAL.

Name: C1: Nendo Supaidā | C1: Clay Spiders
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Description: C1: Nendo Supaidā is a basic form of explosive clay, that is created from a single palm mouth of the user. The user releases the clay figure from their palm mouth which resembles that of a small animal. In this variant the clay figure resembles a small spider in which the user simple throw at the target or even navigate them to crawl amongst a surface. Because of their small size they are typically undetectable. After forming a specific seal with their hands, the user can detonate the clay spiders and cause a explosion equal to a exploding tag, destroying their relative area. From a single use of this technique only three spider can be made, however this technique cannot be re-used until all three spiders are terminated.
Chakra Cost: 3CP

Name: C1: Nendo no Tori | C1: Clay Birds
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Description: C1: Nendo no Tori is a basic form of explosive clay, that is created from a single palm mouth of the user. The user releases the clay figure from their palm mouth which resembles that of a small animal. In this variant the clay figure resembles a bird which are used as a projectile bomb for ranged assaults because of their quick flying ability. After forming a specific seal with their hands, the user can detonate the clay birds and cause a explosion equal to a exploding tag, destroying their relative area. From a single use of this technique only two birds can be made, however this technique cannot be re-used until both birds are terminated.
Chakra Cost: 3CP

Name: C1: Nendo no Hebi | C1: Clay Snakes
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Description: C1: Nendo no Hebi is a basic form of explosive clay, that is created from a single palm mouth of the user. The user releases the clay figure from their palm mouth which resembles that of a small animal. In this variant the clay figure resembles a snake which is capable of moving underground or even binding a target. After forming a specific seal with their hands, the user can detonate the clay snake and cause a explosion equal to a exploding tag, destroying its relative area. From a single use of this technique only one snake can be made, however this technique cannot be re-used until the snake is terminated.
Chakra Cost: 3CP

Name: C1: Nendo no Sakana | C1: Clay Fish
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Description: C1: Nendo no Sakana is a basic form of explosive clay, that is created from a single palm mouth of the user. The user releases the clay figure from their palm mouth which resembles that of a small animal. In this variant the clay figure resembles a fish which is capable of swimming and maneuvering underwater. After forming a specific seal with their hands, the user can detonate the clay fishes and cause a explosion equal to a exploding tag, destroying their relative area. From a single use of this technique only three fish can be made, however this technique cannot be re-used until the fishes are terminated.
Chakra Cost: 4CP

Name: C1: Nendo no Ningen | C1: Clay Human
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Description: C1: Nendo no Ningen is a basic form of explosive clay, that is created from a single palm mouth of the user. The user releases the clay figure from their palm mouth which resembles that of a human. In this variant the clay figure resembles a humanoid which is capable of fighting and reforming themselves if damaged. After forming a specific seal with their hands, the user can detonate the clay humanoids and cause a explosion equal to a exploding tag, destroying their relative area. From a single use of this technique only three humanoids can be made, however this technique cannot be re-used until the humanoids are terminated.
Chakra Cost: 3CP

Name: Shinjuu Zanshu no Jutsu - Double Suicide Decapitation Technique
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m)
Element: Doton (Earth)
Description: Doton • Shinjuu Zanshu no Jutsu is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing the Earth Element. The ninja will travel through the ground to appear below their target. They will then surprise their target by then pulling them into the ground. Once in the ground their target is thus immobilized.
Chakra Cost: 4CP

Name: Dochuu Senkou - Underground Submarine Voyage
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m)
Element: Doton (Earth)
Description: Doton • Dochuu Senkou is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing the Earth Element. After forming the needed hand seals, the user can sink below ground and quickly travel through the earth.
Chakra Cost: 6CP

Name: Doryuusou - Earthen Rising Spears
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m)
Element: Doton (Earth)
Description: This technique lets the user condense mud or stone, from the ground, and shape them into spikes that will protrude from the ground in order to skewer the target. The spikes cannot penetrate targets of greater density.
Chakra Cost: 7CP

Name: Retsudo Tenshou - Revolving Split Earth Palm
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m), Mid (5m - 10m), Far (10+)
Element: Doton (Earth)
Description: Doton • Retsudo Tenshou is a Ninjutsu technique utilizing the Earth Element. This technique allows the ninja to control nearby stone and rock. When the ninja forms the needed handseals and slams their palm to the ground, surrounding rock will begin to churn and twist up crushing all those trapped within it.
Chakra Cost: 9

Name: Kuchiyose no Jutsu - Summoning Technique
Rank: C
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: A powerful jutsu, Ninpo Kuchiyose allows a ninja to summon animals and objects to fight on their behalf. The ninja normally signs a blood contract with the animal species, which allows them to summon different size and skill levels of creature. Signing this contract also allows the animal to reverse summon the human ninja to their location.
Chakra Cost: 5

Name: Bunshin no Jutsu • Clone Technique
Rank: E
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: This technique creates identical clones of the user. However, they hold no actual substance and will disperse upon impact of an attack or contact with an opponent. They cannot disrupt the area around themselves with their movements; won’t kick up dust, crush grass, etc.
Chakra Cost: 1


Name: Kawarimi no Jutsu • Body Replacement Technique
Rank: E
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: This technique allows the user to alter places in a speedy manner with another nearby object. This is done mere seconds before an attack lands, thus making the attacker believe his or her attack was a success. Whatever object was used to alter places will receive the brunt of the enemy’s attack instead.
Chakra Cost: 1

Name: Kai • Release
Rank: D
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m)
Element: N/A
Description: By stopping the flow of chakra in their body, and then applying an even stronger power to disrupt the flow of the caster's chakra; the user may dispel the effects of a genjutsu. This can also be used on another individual that is stuck in a genjutsu by preforming the necessary hand seal and then touching them.
Chakra Cost: 4

Name: Suimen Hokou no Waza • Act of Water Surface Walking
Rank: D
Type: N/A
Range: N/A
Element: NA
Description: This technique allows the user to balance themselves on water by focusing a constant and steady stream of chakra to the user’s feet or hands. Because of water’s nature, this requires the user to be quick to adjust the amount of chakra they must emit to their feet in order to maintain a constant balance. Users may also walk, run and “skate” across the water when using this technique.
Chakra Cost: 3

Name: Kinobori no Waza • Act of Tree Climbing
Rank: D
Type: N/A
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: This technique allows the user to balance themselves on trees and vertical walls by focusing a constant and steady stream of chakra to the user’s feet. Gravity can easy be defined if this technique is mastered, allowing people to even stand upside down. If too much chakra is exerted the user will be pushed away; bark breaking and causing the user to then fall. If not enough chakra is exerted the user will lose their footing and fall.
Chakra Cost: 3

Name: Nawanuke no Jutsu • Escaping Skill
Rank: E
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: This technique allows the user to free themselves should they be tied up. It is extremely basic. This technique can only be used if the user is a higher rank then their captive.
Chakra Cost: 1

Name: Henge no Jutsu • Transformation Technique
Rank: E
Type: Ninjutsu
Range: N/A
Element: N/A
Description: This technique transforms the user’s appearance to that of another person. However, it is not a permanent transformation and a mental image of what they are transformed into. Certain aspects of a ninja will not change merely by transformation, these things may include injuries, tool pocket placements etc. The jutsu will dispel should the user be injured.
Chakra Cost: 1

Kenjutsu

Spoiler:
 

Weapons:

5x Kunai
3 feet nin wire
10x Shuriken
1x Katana




Last edited by G-Unit on Sat 26 Mar 2011, 11:17 pm; edited 4 times in total
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CYANIDE CANDY
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 5:25 am

• Add at least another paragraph and a half to appearances and personality.

• Roleplay sample just needs about 20 more words.

• Fix your coding errors, too, please.
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G-Unit
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 6:41 am

edditted
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Pattycakes
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 8:28 pm

If youre in Iwagakure, your rank should be genin.

Personality and appearance is still too short. They should be two solid paragraphs each. Talk about facial features, body build, height and weight, etc. For personality, discuss how he reacts with others, his philosophies, opinions.
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G-Unit
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 10:01 pm

editted
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Pattycakes
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 10:26 pm

They're still a bit below par. I would aim for at least 20 sentences each
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Elder Sage
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 10:28 pm

Quote :
Name: Flower Petal Escape
Rank: C
Type: Genjutsu
Range: Close (0m - 5m)
Element: N/A
Description: If the user comes under attack, she or he can use this technique to cover her or his escape. After forming the needed hand seals, the user's body will disperse into a shower of flower petals. These petals will confuse and distract her or his opponent while she or he escapes or hides.
Chakra Cost: 7

Since Genjutsu isn't one of your specialties I will have to ask you to remove this technique.
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G-Unit
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 11:18 pm

edditted...

you guys really want to force quality huh?

i like that! i will make sure that i give you my best! ^^b
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Pattycakes
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 11:28 pm

For your Kuchiyose jutsu, do you have a summoning application in the works? If so, it needs to be linked to here =]
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G-Unit
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 11:43 pm

no i dont, i just thought itd be better to have it now than later, besides i had room for it so why not ^^
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Pattycakes
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 26 Mar 2011, 11:50 pm

Fine with me=]

APPROVED
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CYANIDE CANDY
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PostSubject: Re: Haretsu, Raizou [Iwa Genin] Sat 28 May 2011, 9:51 am

ARCHIVED.
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