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Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin]

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Xekiest
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PostSubject: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 2:55 am




Aayleh, Raiden.

THE INFO.

Name: Raiden Aayleh
Nickname: Lightning Rod Taser Man
Age: 14
Gender: Male
Appearance: Raiden Aayleh has long white hair with black eyes hair reaches down to his chin in the front and in the back down to the middle of his neck. 5 feet 3 inches weighing at 115 pounds, carries two scars one small one across his right eye and another slashing down on his back. Most often is seen wearing a white shirt and black pants with a pair of white bandages around his arms from the forearms down to his hands has also been seen wearing a black robe to cover his body with the hood down. along his hands concealed at times by the black robes long sleeves or by the bandages on his arms is a ring with the word "Guidance" imprinted on it and never takes it off. along his neck he has a necklace with a strange jewel at the bottom and the word "Serenity" imprinted on the back of it.

He also carries a small pouch with him where he keeps a small items to keep himself busy such as books, drawing paper, and pencils. Along his waist a belt made from the hide of a wild boar he had killed when he was younger where he can store an assortment of shruikan for ranged combat. His body is skinny and not very muscular and keeps his straight serious face most instances when he is in public. along side his white pouch he has strapped on a much larger money pouch where he stores anything he has earned on his missions. he wears open toed shoes on his feet and straps two hidden kunai to both his legs to make sure he isn't defenseless in certain situations.

On the back of his white shirt he personally sewed on the Hawk Insignia, And on the front two black lines running down from his shoulders to the bottom of his sleeves. He also has a backpack for storing larger items such as multiple books or extra equipment but is rarely ever seen wearing it much less utilizing it. Along both of his arms underneath the two bandages are two tattooed Angels, on his right arm is the "Angel of Light" and on his left is the "Angel of Darkness", both put on to symbolize his lighter and darker side to serve as a reminder to him that he is only human.

Forehead Protector: black wrap with silver plating with the Kumogakure sign engraved on it. Is usually seen around his forehead but will sometimes wear it around his neck.

Personality: Raiden ruthlessly kills his enemies without mercy, executing them in a very cold, technical and calculative fashion. His rigorous upbringing in tandem with the many hardships and tragedies he has suffered, has forced Raiden to harden his emotions and disciplined his skills to perfection. He is undaunted by the lives he must take in order to protect the balance within the world, showing no mercy even to contract killers who have surrendered and given up their armament. Raiden knows life following the ninja path can be both cruel and short, especially for one of his Lineage. He has already felt first hand the brutality of this life; watching Aika, his best friend, murdered right in front of his own eyes. Raiden endures these hardships with his unstoppable will, an indomitable spirit shown in his exploits as he overcomes every challenge and obstacle, surviving even the trauma of death to return and exact his vengeance. Though Raiden cares little for his enemies's well being, he still respects them on a warrior basis, even having mutual respect with some adversaries even respecting his long time rival and friend, Ayane. Outside of battle Raiden is modest and refined and is heralded for being kind and gentle.

Raiden has the demeanor and wisdom of a man far older than himself, an understanding of the world around him and the balance of power within it. He ignores the pursuit of power to the dismayment of his uncle Takeshi, showing no signs of curiosity for the dark powers that dwell. Overall Raiden's exploits have given him an attitude far removed from most others, as he understands things in more abstract and philosophical terms. He adopts a tranquil nature, free flowing most of the time, but unforgiving and crushing when roused.

Likes:
Justice
Revenge
Problem Solving
Silence around enemies or people not close to him
Strength in unity

Dislikes:
Weakness
Trying to do everything alone
Surrendering
Pointless Fighting
Useless Killing
Disobeying Orders


Clan: N/A
Nindō: "Justice will be served, the impure will be cured, cleansed, or destroyed" Raiden believes in justice and revenge, he will stop at nothing to cleanse the world of impure evil souls. Such as greedy lords and evil ninja's

THE NINJA.

Origin: Kaminari no Kuni
Affiliation: Kumogakure
Rank: Genin
Specialties: Ninjutsu, Genjutsu
Elemental Affinities: Raiton (Lightning), Doton (Earth)
Combat Style: Silent Killing. Raiden prefers to silently lure in targets then take them out before they have a chance to react, usually using stealth and a sword and sometimes using ranged attacks. Using hit and run tactics to finish his opponents quick, if the first attack doesn't work he will try and try again. Raiden is a not very good up close and in your fighter making Taijutsu extremely effective when facing him. However tricking opponents into traps or staying hidden from sight, sound, and smell makes Genjutsu his strongest asset in his arsenal. When in a battle to the death there is one goal in mind, what is the quickest way to end the fight with him emerged as victorious, while in friendly spars his goal is what's the quickest way to incapacitate his opponent.

Using mirage Genjutsu and stealth to his advantage he refuses to go all out until he says an opening. Just to stay hidden Raiden will use dirty tactics such as aiming for the eyes with any type of tool that can potentially blind the opponent, if it grants him the advantage, then he WILL use it. He won’t go as far as to threaten civilians or burn down homes, but he will try every other trick in the book. He won’t endanger innocent lives to end his opponent’s life. If sent to capture a target alive, Raiden will try to disarm and maybe even cut off a hand just to stun the target long enough to tie him up and start extracting information.
Special Characteristics:
Spoiler:
 

THE BACKGROUND.

History:
Birth Arc: Born to a wealthy family, The son of Kaeda and Kira, Raiden was born into the Shinobi World; and as required, he would be trained from childhood to walk the path of a ninja, a way of life plagued with danger, pain and sorrow.

Family Life Arc: Raiden grew up to a hostile father and mother, they wanted him to the best he could so they constantly trained him mentally and physically. They put him in the most extreme of situations even going as far as poisoning his food and almost killing him. However he did have one friend through all of the tough times, his best friend, and possible lover, Aika. she stood by him through the worst of the worst earning his respect and his trust. Under Omitsu's care Raiden quickly befriended Kureha and the two became inseparable.

Academy Student Arc: Finally in the academy alongside Aika, Raiden made it his top priority to pass the academy at the very top and beat everyone there was. He was ready. He studied in day and night all while keeping up with his mother and father's tests he was determined to exceed above the others. He memorized every test and every single hand seal even going as far as remembering the small stupid things that didn't even matter. Training intensified as he grew older, adapting to these difficulties, Raiden quickly excelled among his peers, becoming one of the clan's top students. Mastering many ninja skills, to the delight of his father. However on the day of there graduation Aika was killed by a missing nin with two scars over his eyes. The grief shook Raiden hard, and he vowed one day to find and kill that man for what he has done.

Genin Arc: Finally a genin, Raiden was ready to get out there and find the man who killed Aika. But even he knew he would need the help of his team to find and kill this man. However this may be he knew, in his hear, He Was Ready...


Roleplay Sample: The sun was hot but the shade was cool. Shadow positioned himself so his legs were crossing and his hands were behind the back of his head with a piece of wheat in his mouth. He reopened his eyes to the world above. The clouds were big and bushy that day, the birds were chirping and the flowers were blooming, if at all a clear sign of spring and Shadow was bored, he wanted a little mayhem and chaos but of course he was too busy dealing with other forces, such as strengthening himself up so he doesn’t die first day on the job, which would REALLY look bad on everyone. Shadow stood up and paced around for a little while, he was trying to master lung control.. well at least make it so he can last longer if he ever suffocates. He looked to his evil foe the large bucket of water ”Phew.. Alright Shadow you got this, no water can defeat me! I’m a Tengu after all! hah!” he said to himself. He walked over to the bucket of water and stared down into it right into his reflection. His eyes were glowing red, a clear sign of his heritage, and his hair was spiky and long. He touched his right eye scar and then in closed his eyes, remembering to when he was abandoned on the side of the road. He awoke from his daydream to be still staring at himself, to himself he counted from three. Three, Two, One.. and down he went plunging face first into the water. He sat there for a couple of seconds before he opened his eyes underneath the cool blue water and looked around for a second. he thought to himself ”Have i done it? Ah ha! See! What did i tell you Shadow ol’ Boy! No water can defeat a mighty Tengu! Nothing can! Ah ha!--” he would be cut off there by a sudden gasp for air, he jolted himself up out of the water and fell backwards landing directly flat on his ass. He stared at the bucket of water a for a bit then stared down, saying to himself ”Greeeat going Shadow.. A god damn bucket of water defeated the mighty Tengu warrior... What am i? A spirit demon or a bloody cat..” he said to himself before getting up, he walked over to the barrel and stared at his reflection after the ripples in the water stopped moving. His head was drenched in water from his hair to his neck and was still dripping water everywhere. ”Well... I hear the circus is a nice place.. not as entertaining as causing destruction but.. Hey! I can pull off that whole lion jumping through the fire ring act easily..” he said to himself still staring at his reflection. He went over to grab a towel and dried himself off before laying down again staring up at the skies. Was this really all he would ever be? Was this is true potential? It couldn’t be, not for a spirit demon. He stared up at the sky for a little bit longer daydreaming about nothing He reopened his eyes to the world above, and pondered about his place in it all, Where did he come from after all? Of that he had no clue about but it no longer mattered, his only goal now was serving his ultimate master, but how can he serve him in such a weak state right now. He stood up and unsheathed his blade, using it to cut a watermelon he had shoplifted from a very dumb merchant. After munching down on that and thinking more about where he belongs he in the universe he got back up and started pacing again around the water bucket. He stared at it for several long seconds before moving around to the left of it, he put up his fingers to it like he was framing it in order to get a good look at it. He closed his eyes and digged deep, he breathed in and out, this time he could do it for sure. he went over to it and plunged his head in face first. He sat there for a few seconds, a few seconds became a few minutes, a few minutes became twenty minutes, he pulled his head out of the water. He smiled and walked away

THE ARSENAL.

Jutsu, Weaponry, Items etc.

Academy Jutsu:
 

Lightning Jutsu:
 

Earth Jutsu:
 

Kumogakure Specific Techniques:
 

Genjutsu:
 

FACE CLAIM.

Character Claim: Unknown
Source: Devientart
Image URL: http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2010/356/1/f/random_anime_guy_by_pandorabox17-d35eqfo.jpg


Last edited by xekiest on Sat 16 Mar 2013, 3:26 am; edited 53 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 5:14 am

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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 6:01 am

Have you received approval for an Uchiha?
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Xekiest
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 7:03 am

Persy wrote:
Have you received approval for an Uchiha?

no one told me >.> and i can't PM but Enzo was kind enough to ask for permission for me so if i need to i can take this down for now
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 2:53 pm


xekiest wrote:
no one told me >.> and i can't PM but Enzo was kind enough to ask for permission for me so if i need to i can take this down for now
Uchiha Clan wrote:
Clan Details: 4/6 [Admin Permission Required]
You also require permission for a Jounin character, which I'm assuming you have?
scratch

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Xekiest
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 3:15 pm

Cookie Monster wrote:

xekiest wrote:
no one told me >.> and i can't PM but Enzo was kind enough to ask for permission for me so if i need to i can take this down for now
Uchiha Clan wrote:
Clan Details: 4/6 [Admin Permission Required]
You also require permission for a Jounin character, which I'm assuming you have?
scratch

Yeah ill take the character down
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 3:21 pm


xekiest wrote:
Yeah ill take the character down
You don't need to be so drastic about it, all you have to do is seek Administrative approval for an Uchiha Jounin.

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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 3:23 pm

Cookie Monster wrote:

xekiest wrote:
Yeah ill take the character down
You don't need to be so drastic about it, all you have to do is seek Administrative approval for an Uchiha Jounin.

Like i said Enzo was asking permission for me, but i forgot to mention the Jounin part so i PMed an admin myself just waiting for an answer Smile

Edit: Revised and Edited due to help from Adam through PMing
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Mon 16 Apr 2012, 5:35 pm


Without taking a proper look over of your character, I've already picked up on the fact that you still include pieces of History that go beyond the rank of Genin. You also harbour quite a lot of techniques that go beyond your rank as well, a Genin is only permitted to have C - Rank techniques and below. Please go about your entire character and remove any sections that exceed your rank.

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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Tue 17 Apr 2012, 3:38 am

edited again
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Enzo
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Thu 19 Apr 2012, 6:21 pm

I'll be nitpicking quite a bit, as Dari has covered most of this.
  • Though 16 year olds in the modern day are usually as tall as yours, do remember Naruto is about 5'5", if not 5'6". Kakashi is the same height as your character, and he's a full grown adult. Please tone down his height a bit to be more relative. Also, he's VERY skinny for a Genin. And by skinny I mean, no muscle at all. He's a Taijutsu user, why is he so skinny?
  • Please state the location of your forehead protector in appearance. I cannot find it anywhere. All ninja must wear a forehead protector.
  • You cannot have a katana unless you have Weaponry. Though the current weapon encyclopedia is being updated, Katanas will remain C-rank, and thus members cannot have one unless they actually have Weaponry as a Specialty. Therefore remove all mentions of a Katana from your appearance and Aresenal.
  • Quote :
    Very Intelligent for his age recorded IQ of 115.
    You do realize 115 is not that high.. it's 15 points above average for your age. 120-80 is considered average in the modern world, and since IQ tests can be assumed the same in Naruto, it's very ordinary. He may be adapt at stuff, but he's no Genius. Not to mention if you wanted a Genius, you'd need the High IQ Special Characteristic. (Do note IQ is intelligence quotient. It's an average collected of all the people in your character's age group. 100 is always the basic. As time goes by, a person who had 100 in 1930 may have 90 in 1940. IQ changes according to the global average. It's not a numeric system based around who can one-up another. The smarter the general population grows, the closer to the center you will be.)
  • You may (and are encouraged to) add more jutsu. The 8 Academy jutsu don't go toward the 15 jutsu limit. Feel free to add more jutsu if you wish.
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Sat 23 Jun 2012, 1:19 pm


Archived.
Due to inactivity.

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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Wed 13 Mar 2013, 10:40 am

Unarchived due to user request
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MsMoney
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Wed 13 Mar 2013, 3:47 pm

Is this being worked on now, or were you going to just let it be modded in this form? If you are working on it again, please put the title into W.I.P.

If you are not working on it, do you have permission to again apply for Uchiha? And you are missing the forehead section, and a few academy jutsu, and can't have a katana if you don't have Weaponry.

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Xekiest
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Thu 14 Mar 2013, 11:50 pm

MsMoney wrote:
Is this being worked on now, or were you going to just let it be modded in this form? If you are working on it again, please put the title into W.I.P.

If you are not working on it, do you have permission to again apply for Uchiha? And you are missing the forehead section, and a few academy jutsu, and can't have a katana if you don't have Weaponry.


huh? I edited out all of the Katana and Uchiha parts and my forehead section is there. I checked and all of the academy jutsu are there also.
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Fri 15 Mar 2013, 3:57 am

Quote :
huh? I edited out all of the Katana and Uchiha parts and my forehead section is there. I checked and all of the academy jutsu are there also.

When I looked at it yesterday, things were not so peachy as you describe them now. Anyway, let us get to the modding Smile



  • Quote :
    As a ninja, Raiden ruthlessly kills his enemies without mercy, executing them in a very cold, technical and calculative fashion.

    Last time I checked, not all ninja and hardly all ruthlessly kill their enemies without mercy.

    If you could also add a bit more to your personality. Could be likes and dislikes.

  • Put your rank at Genin please.

  • Your combat style needs to be one solid paragraph. A single paragraph is about 250 - 300 words. Include in it the biggest weakness and biggest strength.

  • It's best if you don't put your posts in one big block like with the rp sample. It makes it harder to read. Also keep in mind that we will be expecting your posts to be the same size/ or similar as your rp sample.

  • You have 6 jutsu but can start out with 15. It's not something mandatory, but recommended.

  • Can you put your FC so that the first section says Unknown, and the next only Deviantart?

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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Fri 15 Mar 2013, 4:35 am

MsMoney wrote:
Quote :
huh? I edited out all of the Katana and Uchiha parts and my forehead section is there. I checked and all of the academy jutsu are there also.

When I looked at it yesterday, things were not so peachy as you describe them now. Anyway, let us get to the modding Smile



  • Quote :
    As a ninja, Raiden ruthlessly kills his enemies without mercy, executing them in a very cold, technical and calculative fashion.

    Last time I checked, not all ninja and hardly all ruthlessly kill their enemies without mercy.

    If you could also add a bit more to your personality. Could be likes and dislikes.

  • Put your rank at Genin please.

  • Your combat style needs to be one solid paragraph. A single paragraph is about 250 - 300 words. Include in it the biggest weakness and biggest strength.

  • It's best if you don't put your posts in one big block like with the rp sample. It makes it harder to read. Also keep in mind that we will be expecting your posts to be the same size/ or similar as your rp sample.

  • You have 6 jutsu but can start out with 15. It's not something mandatory, but recommended.

  • Can you put your FC so that the first section says Unknown, and the next only Deviantart?


Done!.. I think lol
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Sat 16 Mar 2013, 3:03 am

- Why did you put your likes and dislikes in the history? Normally they go in the personality section.

- Can you also change the name of the application, so it's his full name before the village and rank? And take out the 'completed'.
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Sat 16 Mar 2013, 3:26 am

MsMoney wrote:
- Why did you put your likes and dislikes in the history? Normally they go in the personality section.

- Can you also change the name of the application, so it's his full name before the village and rank? And take out the 'completed'.
Done
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Sun 17 Mar 2013, 6:46 pm

(1/2) approved.
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Tue 19 Mar 2013, 9:49 am

2/2 approved.

Make an account here for dem dollas.
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PostSubject: Re: Aayleh, Raiden [Kumo Genin] Sun 16 Jun 2013, 5:14 pm

Archived.
Due to user inactivity. 

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